Top Gear or Top Punch ?

I myself don’t watch the show, it is about cars and frankly I only own one, have no interest in racing one, or collecting them. Mind you the Farmer does have a 1978 CL Valiant with red bucket seats in it here for sale if anyone is interested (yes it does go). But other than that not a show I watch and today we read about the host of the show having an alleged punch up with a producer and people asking that he be reinstated. what is that?

In a world where women are dying weekly at the hands of a known partner or person, we have a TV star (loosely said) punching a producer, whether it be male or female it doesn’t matter. This takes work place bullying to the extreme don’t you think? and all over not having dinner ready for the man after filming. Sadly he must think he is that important and protected (which according to those begging for him to come back) he is.

Where are those cries looking out for the producer, who is protecting him? Are the BBC 2 really going to allow this violent bully to come back into the same environment, into the producers space and let him dictate over again his demands and use violent actions if things don’t go his way? I have not read of any apology from Clarkson over the incident so does this imply he believes he was right in taking this action? as most bullies and those that strive to dominate and humiliate people do?

We all know of someone who has had workplace bullying and most of the time it is put down to “personality clashes” I believe there is no such thing. It comes from a place of jealously, a place of superiority and dominance and should have no place where you work. To be yelled at, given unrealistic time lines, projects, have your desk moved without permission, others take credit for your hard work, to have someone watch the clock and report comings and goings is all a part of workplace bullying and most of us can say we have been subjected to this. In this day and age, emails are monitored and mobile phone locations are read so that those that wish to penalize you and demean you can get access to these and fire you, make you redundant or simply make your work place an awful place to be until you leave. None of these are acceptable, so punching someone should be an automatic criminal offense, the boss should have called the police in protect the victim and have the perpetrator charged and dismissed, no matter how popular/ attractive / high on the management chain they are.

Would all of those be crying for Clarkson to come back if he punched a woman? I also suspect if Mr. Clarkson was the person punched, we would see a photograph of the perpetrator all over the internet wouldn’t we (a police mug shot)? It also doesn’t matter why he was that quick to go from anger to violence, there is no excuse. I don’t think in his world of self-importance he would tolerate this for a minute. Do people really think is it ok for him to have punched a man who was only doing his job? I find this astounding and I use the word punch here so no one can mistake it for a ‘push’ a ‘shove’ a slight ‘slap” as those words seem to add a gentle twist to violent crimes don’t they? As for the show “Top Gear” wasn’t on my list of ‘must watch” ever and still won’t be, I won’t condone violence and an organization who believes it’s ok.





Isn’t it a terrible word? Just the word congers up so many things. In our growing years we would have seen it, been party to it, done it, ignored it and defended it It starts almost from when we want to get things others have. The classic line being “You’re not my very best friend anymore, she is and she’s coming to my house to play” or earlier still, “you can play with me in the sand pit”. How our older peers dealt with these things would have significant in the way in which we behaved as young teens going into adult hood then into our working career.

I think if anyone tells you they were not a bully, it may not be as accurate as they think. Pushing in to get to the front of the tuck shop line can now be classed as bullying. In my day it was to get in the  front of the line, pushing others was part of the course. Being a tuck shop mum later in life, there was tuck shop monitors, tuck lunch collectors and tuck shop purchasers, it all became very structured and probably good for the little ones who were dominated by the older ones. But the bullying was taken away from the line ans there is always that child who waits and jumps on the purchasers cache, taking the best lollies, getting the first crisp and or complaining if their friend didn’t share.

Later in life there was the work place bully, the ‘older’ supervisor who would give you the worst jobs. I worked in a local retail store and despite the fact I loved check out, I worked for a compnay who had the first computerised cash register in South Australia. There were no scanners and it was more like a glorified calculator but I enjoyed it, I was ordered to go out back and help wrap lay-bys, do stock take and pick clothes of the floor that people had pulled off coat hangers, or worst still have to go to the exchange counter and collect old stock or tell an ‘older’ person we couldn’t take their 2 yr old worn out tracksuit back. It was terrible, but I did it, it gave me an opportunity to earn my own money and have independence. This was the time that Saturday morning trading had just commenced as well. I didn’t see it a bullying but took it that perhaps I was a bit more competent than others at putting clothes back on coat hangers correctly (as silly as this sounds, I took pride in my work.

Moving into my big girls career i chose nursing, now here is where bullying, sexual harassment and glass ceilings are hidden under the veil of being a caring professional. I was once at a work Christmas party just after the anti-discrimination laws came in and sexual harassment laws were being implemented and an anaesthetist said ‘well they have taken sexual harassment out of the operating theatres so it’s time for me to retire.” I was shocked at this not because it was said out loud but we didn’t consider things like ‘dirty jokes” to be sexual harassment. But we all moved on, these laws gave some of the bullies a louder voice. I worked with one nurse (actually many) who believed it was her/his “turn” for a promotion as she had been there the longest, despite job promotions asking for qualifications or to be working towards them if your face didn’t fit you were not selected for the role. I did extra curricular study and worked towards all the promotions I applied for and I never got one, I was loud, I was opinionated (still am) and I realised that I was never going to get one. The last role promotion I applied for I was acting in (and felt for sure I would get the position) and the Director of Nursing called my home where my younger brother happened to be babysitting for me that day and without asking him who he was she told him over the phone I didn’t get the job. He didn’t tell me straight away he just said she had called, so imagine my surprise (as I KNEW I was going to get the role I had been in) when she had to awkwardly tell me in person I didn’t get the job, OVER THE PHONE. I jumped in my car and fronted her, it didn’t end well and I left the institution not long after.

I have tried from that day not to bully people, to be conscious of their needs and assist them. I worked as a medical rep for years and in one of my last full time paid roles I worked in an office with other staff members. No matter how many times I would ask if there was anything wrong, I would not get an honest answer “nothing’ or “I’m having a bad day” it took me a long while to work out that this staff member would never tell me anything. As with a lot of bullies they hide behind “I can’t speak to you.” “I find you unapproachable” or “I need help to have meetings with you” or worse still you start hearing the complaints that are being made behind your back and when you try to address it, they take sick leave, deny it or go over your head to more senior staff and drag as many people into it without ever addressing the issue. As I said I am not perfect but if you can’t address the behavior and how to have a good working environment then everybody looses.

I have witnessed another form of bullying in my recent days, and have felt very sad and powerless to assist the person on the receiving end. Corporate bullying takes many forms from many people and can involve committee members, staff members & Board members. A group or posse of people can willingly make or break a career for no other reasons other than they make dislike the actions of others, they may not agree with them and they may been seen to have more power. Without a strong Chair or leader this will go unchecked and leave no protection to the person at the receiving end. It is these types of events that divide people and never good for any organization or workplace. Staff become divided, it can then become an us versus them group and leaves everybody feeling terrible, without good mechanisms to address things they become whispers, rumors and also sends people underground, fearful for their own jobs. They become silenced as speaking out can bring attention to ones self and a swift reaction from the upper powers and comments then go into the community, warranted or unwarranted.

There are no real studies on corporate bullying, if anyone knows of any please feel free to post. If there are articles on how to handle the bullying leader I would also love to have them, it may help being able to start to put things into perspective.


loving facebook today

Interesting I have a love hate relationship with facebook as I am sure we all do. It shows snippets of our lives, it invites us into the lives of people we admire, love and care for or want to be apart of like celebrities and look at businesses without being bothered by sales people or it helps people look into lives of others so that we can keep track of them.

I have had a girlfriend recently re-unite with a step daughter with whom she had been looking for for a while. I used it to create a page and orgainse a 30 yr High School reunion. That was fun, we posted pictures of our school graduation, school formal and then pictures in between. There were pictures from our 20 yr High School reunion and now our 30th. The fun and laughter and the rekindling of friendships would not have happened without facebook. Doing the 20 yr was hard as there was no face book, I sent letters and relied on others to chase people up. We have shared 30 years of our lives, a group of students who spent the formative years together, apart and now back together, even at the 30 yr reunion there was tears of opportunities lost. A lovely tribute to the closeness of a 200+ people where when meeting up after all this time, it felt like time had melted away, faces hadn’t changed that much but pathways lives and loves had. Isn’t that the beauty of it all, we can come together and feel like we had not been apart.

Face book has been great for those of us wanting to stay in touch with family & friends but what about the other side of it. The side where you don’t know who is watching, reporting and passing comment or judging? This is the part I don’t like, I also don’t like the bullying part and even at my age (I am the demographic that is on face book) it comes in a different form and that is of the passive aggressive veiled comments posted. These comments generate comments and questions but the person never answers honestly they just move on.

I followed the good advice of she has a great blog follow her, where she suggests that one should up date or delete their face book friends and twitter friends every now and then. I followed this advice as there are people or I should say were people that have moved out of my life and also had friends that I didn’t want my updates to be shared with. There is that lovely tool where you can block random people ‘friends of friends’ making rude or derogatory comments on your photos and status posts.

Today I found the blocking tool, boy did I have fun, my blog has been a problem for some people and yesterdays was also one. This was the passive aggressive comment on another ‘friends’ update so I private message her to see if she was ok, but that was ignored so I thought, I will block her.

See that is the beauty of our lives, don’t read me if you don’t like it, contact me direct if you want to comment, I would be more than happy to share the reasons why I blogged it, my contact details are easy to find, I will be more than happy to send them to anyone that wants them. Better than that block me! I blocked people that don’t even follow me but are friends on other people’s pages that I just don’t want them to know my business, troll into my page and make a judgement on my life. Is this over kill? perhaps but I enjoyed it 🙂

I didn’t even bother taking the time to check out their page I have no interest in face book stalking, I have plenty more I can do. I have been out this morning and helped my husband build a new sheep race. I have built a fire and pulled out the book work and have 3 cats inside and Pete the golden retriever asleep at my feet so, I find more pleasure in this than looking into the lives of others I wouldn’t necessarily ask them about if I were face to face with them.

I even went through and ‘unliked’ pages, sometimes the feed it too much or too often or just not relevant to my life. I also can stop stupid (in my opinion) unfunny jokes likes the ones from Mrs Browns Boys. It may just be me, but I don’t find it funny. Men dressing up in women’s clothing is really becoming passe really unless they are professional impersonators who just wow a crowd with talent and class. Mrs Browns Boys to me comes across as crude, rude and sexist, as I said could be me). Facebook gives me the opportunity to hide them, report them (which I have never done) and completely ignore them.

Kevin is a bully can’t people see that?

My DH (Dear Husband) thinks I am enjoying the spectacle of the political undertakings, Julia squirming, Ministers having political dummy spits & Kevin well then there’s Kevin. I am hearing the words “micro-manager” “insular” “solo decision manager” “temperament & inability to have decisions made”. Not enough support yet as I said to DH is what they are not saying is that all these words amount to bullying. Why are they not saying it? is this because this goes against all of their Industrial Relations Laws. Bully’s should be dismissed immediately but as in this case it came from the top and when you are in a bullying situation it normally comes from the top. Think the previous David Jones Manager – besides sexual harassment it is bullying. There will be out cries from the Rudd supporters, nothing wrong with Micro- Managing – some managers have lots to share  – which is disguised term for “do it my way or put up with the constant harassment, phone calls and exclusion.

We know he is a bully so why are they covering it in shades of grey? this would be because all Political Parties would have to be accountable for how they treat each other as examples to all employers all over the country. The Leadership spill is just the tip of the iceberg and should be taught in schools as classic bullying that is never resolved nor identified. Bully’s aren’t defined by size shape or position they are just people who think they “know better” “know more” “feel threatened” “taller” “shorter” “fatter” “thinner” “male” “female” and just plain mean and manipulative. We have all experienced this person, they are egocentric “but I’m meant to take responsibility for that” was a statement I was told once despite the fact I considered us a team and was only assisting as they were busy doing other things.

Bullys are also “victims” of their own press and self belief and they normally can not see or recognise the effect they have on others. I am thinking how dare they, he hold up in a 5 or 6 star hotel in America on the pigs back sucking the taxpayers money, he resigned all privileges should be revoked immediately and he should be given the bill. Never alone left to sit in this hotel racking up bills for himself and now the poor staff that would effectively be out of a job as he resigned his position. Selfish and a bully.I can’t think of 1 boss I have ever had that would have allowed this behaviour, approved a person to have asleep over in a hotel, get 1st class tickets to return after starting the fight. She in a 5 star hotel overlooking beautiful Glenelg beach, seeing her Mum I can get, when you are bullied, terminated, happy or sad some of us look to our Parents or significant others  for emotional support. She is in a no win situation, not saying she is without blame but it is really poor form on his part. She the boss – is this sexual harassment on his part? would he be doing this to another man?

I feel cheated, my vote discounted, there will be hours of work / productivity wasted watching the school yard, office bully to attempt to appear the aggrieved and justify his actions and reactions. We shall await the fallout it will come and it is normally swift. To all of our pollies, many of us say “stop it, call an election for we the people paying your salaries deserve better and not to be dragged into the Board Room fight” Whether you like Kevin or Julia surely you can see this episode is nothing short of bullying. is anyone else feeling cheated watching this train wreck?