When it doesn’t work … what then

It is amazing isn’t it we go along for great periods of time working at things to achieve outcomes and some of these take years. We can work at being married, being a parent, a friend, a sister, a mother and though at times we faulter and feel like failures we know these are the things we love and enjoy so we move on from the times it may seem hard.

These are things that are everyday and only feel like work when it does get hard, what about life’s intrusions such as work, there is paid employment, volunteer ‘work’ and then there is the slog of daily activities that lead to being paid, in the case of farming there is periods without income and then periods with income, selling crop and animals is cyclic and not a weekly or monthly income. All farmers wait for better prices, sometimes they come sometimes they don’t.

What if you get to the stage where you know you’re doing it wrong, perhaps that’s harsh, as there is no such thing as wrong, it’s should be called different. Once you get to the point where there is no outcomes most change tactics and farmers are experts at this, they really are. I am amazed at their strengths, tenacity and ingenuity and most perseverance. Their ability to assess, nurture and move on in agriculture, I believe there is not another job in the world that is more difficult. What they do grows things, feeds other people, it keeps animals alive in times of drought and without farmers where would be get our industries from.

When most people come to the point where they know what they are doing needs a change in direction, do most people do this or fall back onto the defensive, “this is the way I have always done it so I’m finding people who will support this.” I am guilty of this in past careers, move on rather than adapt and change, moving the country has given me a different perspective, I HAVE to adapt to environment, employment opportunities (where there is none) and outcomes on areas I assist in. I don’t believe I do much work as I don’t value my own contribution to farming, I can’t see deliverables and this may be a wrong assumption. I know my husband thanks me all the time for what I do, but as a person we value ourselves on the income we provide to contribute to our households and I haven’t been able to do this for a long time.

Do I stop now what I am doing and move myself out of my own way and into paid employment? I have retrained albeit in an industry I never thought I would go (Beauty) and whilst I enjoy what I do , it really is the ‘nice’ career and not really mentally challenging. Do I keep going and work with people that can’t deliver back to me? I think I am a good change agent, I take people on face value and am finding that we are poles apart, what I need now isn’t where they are at.

In my network I have many a strong highly educated women that through no fault of their own find / found themselves redundant and all by other women. It is astounding that we don’t support the sisterhood, women in power seem to get rid of those that the feel ‘threaten them’ rather than nurture and support. Is there an industry out there for women who can but are held back not by men but by other women? I believe so, but how does one break this cycle when even the retiring Gail Kelly – selects a male to step into her shoes rather than the woman who sat alongside her and supported her?

It’s one of those days, where I know I’m going to have to change tactics and advance myself or I am going to be doing laser hair removal on every bikini line in the district…