Today is brought to you by the Letter F

Living on a farm you get use to the fact there is no noise. You can hear cars coming from kilometres away, day or night. You can tell the difference between Utes, tractors town cars, semi-trailors and trucks just to name a few. We can hear the sounds of animals cattle and sheep, the occasional dog bark and the call of other animals depending upon the stillness of the day or night. There is one sound though that sends dogs running, has farmers wives on tender hooks and looking to render assistance should it be called for and has farmers red in the face, sometimes followed up by the roaring around of the Ute on the farm or the slamming of the door as the farmer comes inside.

It can carry from the shed, the paddocks, the shearing shed, the cattle yards, the sheep yards and the Ute, it comes unexpectedly, is loud and strikes that fear into all who hear it. It can travel all  over the farm yard and if it followed up by a loud bang then things have gone awry for some reason or another. If I see the working dogs come running back to their compounds then I know that things are turning into a disaster and the dogs have bailed on the farmer.

If the Ute comes roaring around the drive to the front of the house and I happen to see it I will hang up the phone (if I am on it) and go to see what the problem is. When it occurs there can be a dozen or more problems, I have given up guessing I wait to hear the story. The cattle have eaten the cables to the pivot, the energizer, taken out fences, don’t have enough to eat are “bastards” same goes for the sheep, Made worse by the fact that the dogs upon the commencement of the yelling will run away.

They say animals especially dogs can learn over 100 words and this is one I can attest to, they duck and go running when they hear the word “fuck”. I could say with confidence it can be the most used word in the farmers day and said in many tones and afflictions. It can be said with meaning, said quickly, yelled and said in relation to inanimate objects, living objects, mechanical objects and of course people.

Also how it sounds can be determined by the location on the farm the farmer is at the time, the winds and how quickly the dogs make it back to the farm house. “Fuck” on the farm is used as a noun, an adjective, a verb or an adverb depending upon the situation, who is involved, what is involved and the outcome at the end of the swearing episode, lets be honest it can be said consecutively up to 6 times or more. It is said as machinery breaks down, phones are hung up and a plethora of other instances.

Dogs patiently waiting  for the farmer

Dogs patiently waiting for the farmer

2 thoughts on “Today is brought to you by the Letter F

Comments are closed.