Isn’t life interesting how one day you can be on top of things and the next be really down. I think all of us at some stage in our lives suffer depression. I know I did when I hurt my back, I couldn’t work and the grief of losing friends / work colleagues was over whelming. I remember being in hospital in traction for a couple of weeks hoping this was not going to be my life. I was a young mum with no partner support but luckily the support of my family who helped me in more ways than one. I met a Dr who was more attuned to mental pain than physical pain and he taught me how to distinguish between them. to this day I thank him, I was caught in that horrible trap of pain, medications, more pain and not working. He identified it was also depression I was suffering from and medicated me appropriately, it took about 12 months to recover and come off medication but I achieved this and going back to nursing.
I watch myself now for the same signs, I still experience back pain daily and with the loss of some functions and weight gain it is very easy to fall back into the mindset of not being able to cope. I know I cope better working than I do not, I know I am happier when I help others than just sitting around watching TV. That is not to say I do not like watching TV but it really has its place. I spent the day yesterday helping my mother and sister in preparing sponsorship packages and letters for her choir who have been invited to sing in Carnegie hall and I also nearly completed all of my book work to which my accountant will be pleased once I hand it over to her.
Today for me is always today, yesterday seems so long ago, I am lucky I have never lived in my past, I have made my mistakes and have moved on, it does not mean I don’t regret my actions nor look back and realise missed opportunities, work life and in my love life. But these have all led me along the path I am on now and I have met and married DH – my first and final Husband. My DH always uses the comment “there is always somebody else having a worse day than you” He is correct and I try to live by that in my daily.